When I was a sophomore in high school, I had a civics teacher named Sidney Spiegel. I liked him and his class. I clearly remember something he said one day,
“Be opinionated. Think something.”
His words resonated with me then and they still do. I believe that ‘passionately’ is the only way to live and the only way to become passionate about something is to have a strong opinion about it. I hold my opinions, my actions and my beliefs passionately. I am, and I am proud to say it, opinionated.
This is not to say that I am a blowhard or bombastic. I’m not a bully or unreasonable. I have a heart and listening ears, and I am willing and thoroughly able to reason and change my thinking and my mind. I am also very willing to agree to disagree.
Occasionally, I offend people. This does bother me. I like people and I want others to like me. When I am discussing a topic – any topic – with someone, I do it how I do everything, ardently. The question is this- is it my specific opinion that offends or the fact that, in this world of lukewarm (or is it apathetic?) tolerance for everything, the mere fact that I have a strong opinion and energy enough to stand up for it does?
For years, well really, for most of my life since I heard Sid Spiegel give me permission to hold tightly to my values and defend them with rigor, I have had seasons in which I stepped on someone’s toes and then felt a huge amount of remorse for it. I have wished many times that I didn’t have “such a big mouth”, and I’ve tried to squelch my passion and sit quietly. In reality, I have berated myself for being me. Don’t hear me incorrectly – I have not been remorseful for believing what I believe, but I’ve been sad that somehow I came across to someone else negatively and thought that it was somehow an indication of my own character flaw. It’s happened again recently, twice. Both times, someone avoided me in what I can guess was an attempt to not have to deal with me. At first, I was hurt. I started on the familiar routine inside my head that tells me I did something wrong for holding strong beliefs and arguing for them zealously and for being who I am. I began hearing my inner critic telling me over and over how awful I am. Then, something inside my head snapped and I realized that I don’t have to please others. I don’t have to change my beliefs or the passion with which I live my life because it might bother someone. So, today, right now, I declare to world: I am opinionated and passionate and if you disagree with me, that’s ok.
