There surely seems to be a lot of horrid things going on lately. In my little, boring town there have been two separate shootings in the past few days that have left people dead and hurting. Glance at the national news and you’ll see shootings and stabbings and bombs. I don’t want to think about those things this morning. The sun is warm, leaves are just beginning to turn, their yellows and reds are vibrant against the blue sky. So. Today I refuse to think on bad things, and I choose to think on the true, noble, right and praiseworthy….
I have a goldfish. His tank is next to me as I write. The bubbling of the filter reminds me of the chuckling of a small mountain spring.
His name is Filaya Fish. Say it out loud and you’ll get it. He was named by a student I had several years ago. Filaya had a partner named Stick. (Fish Stick… see a pattern?) Now poor Stick passed on at Easter time. He wasn’t as flamboyant or pretty as Filaya even though he was a brighter orange – but they were friends and we were sad to see him go. I wondered how Filaya would handle the loss. He’s fine. In fact, without Stick around, Filaya has grown. Literally. He is bigger. Being alone in his tank has afforded him more room to become. His tail is long, nearly transparent and a little iridescent. His top fin flutters as he swims.
Now I know that his brain is the size of a bead, and he probably has no sentient thought. He is in fact, a fish. But, I can’t help but watch him, calm and serene as he swims and floats, and I can’t help but think that he is happy. When I walk into the office first thing in the morning and he first catches sight of me, he swims really fast to the top right corner of the tank. He continues to swim and look at me, moving his tail back and forth quickly, keeping his eye on the prize, until I feed him. To me, that looks like happiness, like anticipation, like complete trust that I will, in fact, feed him.
Genesis says that fish were created on the fifth day. People weren’t created until the sixth. Fish, like the rest of the animals, weren’t created from dirt, they were just formed. The most important difference is that people were formed of dirt and then God himself ‘breathed into [our] nostrils the breath of life’. So, we people are in God’s image and filled with His own breath. My little Filaya was simply ‘brought forth’. He’s not special, he’s not chosen by God for special favor or set apart to do anything remarkable. He’s just a fish. What can I learn from my little goldfish today? Happiness, calmness, faith, I want to be like Filaya today. I don’t want to worry or get overwhelmed by the negative. I want to feel my life flowing around me, I want to be excited when I notice blessings coming my way. I want to just Be.
