Step into my parlor said the spider to me…

Posted on February 11, 2019 by Donna Coulson

We took a hike a couple of weeks ago in the rainforest. Now St. Croix’s rain forest is relatively small, but it offers pretty much everything you’d expect in a rain forest (except large, colorful birds and monkeys. I think it needs flamboyant parrots and macaws and howling, swinging monkeys, but alas, there are neither here.) Anyway, we hiked up a watercourse – which is called a gut here. I took my camera and had a field day snapping the interesting and the beautiful.

Beauty in the details
Part of a tree called “Monkey No Climb”. Can you tell where its name came from?
Dried flower on the vine.

There is a downside to such an outing, I truly hate walking through a spider web.  I have instant fear of being covered with spiders when I do.  Yuck.  Remember the scene in Madagascar when the lion walks through the web?  That’s me – dancing and brushing myself off.  The end of that scene when the lion realizes he has a huge arachnid on his back haunts me, and after I walk through a web, I thoroughly expect for some multi-eyed and eight-legged hitchhiker to greet me with a resounding “Well Hidee do!”

Just hanging out.

*shivering*  Anyway.  Thankfully I did not walk through one particularly wide web, inhabited by a seriously large but beautiful spider.  Instead, I was able to watch and snap some pictures of her.  She was, however, unimpressed with me and as I watched her, another, smaller spider joined her in the net. Before I realized exactly what she was doing, she wrapped him up in webbing, presumably to save for a snack later.  *again shivering*. 

Meeting her new friend.
That about wraps him up.

I’ve thought a lot about that spider.  I’ve considered how happy I am that I didn’t walk through her web.  I’ve also thought about how beautiful and intricate the markings on her body were.  I’ve considered her actions of eating her guests.  Mostly, I’ve thought about how the details and intricacies of spiders speak so much about the Creator of those spiders. I can’t explain a whole lot about our world, but watching a spider dance on her web, or encountering dolphins like I did last week, or watching the light dazzle through the clouds as it sets – all these wonders of nature reinforce to me that we are here by Design not accident.  And that reassurance comforts and encourages me.  God is good all the time.

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Dolphin Encounter

Posted on February 5, 2019 by Donna Coulson

While we should count every day as a privilege we’ve been granted, there’s no doubt that some days just end up being more special than others.  Yesterday pretty much pegged the amazing meter for me. About a mile and a half north of the island of St. Croix is another, much smaller place called Buck Island.  It’s actually called Buck Island Reef National Monument, and it includes the sea around the island with a reef filled with amazing coral and fish.  Karl and I have been there two other times, and it’s always worth the trip. (A little commercial here- we always take a tour with a company called Big Beard’s and they rock!  If you ever get to go to Buck Island – this is the best way to go.) Yesterday we went with friends from Wyoming, Katie and Henry and Diego.

For the first stop on the all-day trip, the tour takes you to Turtle Beach – a beautiful stretch of white, powdery sand.  This is the spot to test your equipment and get your snorkeling perfected before moving around the island to the stunning coral reefs and the unbelievable fish there. 

We were winding down our time at Turtle Beach.  Karl had taken my snorkel gear back to the boat and Katie and I were looking for baby turtle tracks and walking the beach.  All of a sudden people were getting excited.  A pod of dolphins were playing about 40 yards off shore.  People in the water were heading out to them, and I was lamenting that I didn’t have my gear, when Karl came running down the sand with them.  We threw on the fins and snorkels and started kicking out.  Katie stayed on shore, and yelled at me once that the dolphins were moving to my right, so I changed direction and started kicking hard.  They were traveling away from us.

Close enough to touch

Then.  I could hear little clicks and snippets of an eerie melody coming through to me from the water, and then.  Karl and I were surrounded by five dolphins.  A mom and baby below us, two large ones close enough to touch.  They were near only a short time, but they acknowledged us, eye contact.  They greeted us, checked us out, and then leisurely swam past.

What an incredible gift.  Knowing that they were headed away from us then turned around to meet us, makes me wonder why.  Did they enjoy seeing us as much as we enjoyed seeing them?  I hope so.   

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Squeaky Wheels

Posted on January 28, 2019 by Donna Coulson

                I believe in the adage “The squeaky wheel gets the grease.” I’m an avid squeaky wheel.  Sometimes when I let someone else know how I feel or what is needed, I don’t get what I want. Other times I annoy the person I’ve encountered. Occasionally, I have even made things worse.   When I’m engaged in this activity, often it causes Karl and others around me a bit of embarrassment.  Mostly, I am not deterred though, since the rate of return on my squeaks remains high.

                Hurricane Hugo did a lot of damage in 1989 on St. Croix.  We weren’t here then, but we have lived with one remnant of Mr. Hugo since we bought our house. Our power pole lists at about a 60-degree angle. It looks as if it is reaching for the sea.  Besides looking kinda funny, it often worries Karl that it will fall down, especially since the pole is also very old and cracked. 

                After Maria, we’d hoped that when the power was restored we’d also get a new, straight pole.  This was not to be.  The guys were in a hurry and much more focused on getting the electricity back on as opposed to making our pole look good. After 77 days without current, we were anxious as well and thankful for the light, so I didn’t squeak beyond a perfunctory inquiry. 

But now.  There have been bucket trucks and burly workmen in our area for the past week.  They are replacing poles with new, taller specimens, and running new wire.  Twice, I mentioned to Karl how maybe we should stop and talk to them and see if they could replace our pole.  He scoffed.  He patiently explained that most certainly there was a master plan for the poles they are replacing, and that if we went through proper channels and called the power company to request a new pole, maybe they’d oblige us.  His answer made sense. I resolved to make the call on Monday morning. But my urge got the better of me yesterday, Sunday, as we were passing (it was a tight passage and our little pickup barely fit between the fence and the bucket truck on the road below our house), and I did some polite squeaking.  Karl just grinned and shook his head.  Squeaking once again gets results and we’ve been listened to, investigated and approved for a new pole!  It isn’t here yet, but we’ve been assured it will be installed within the next few days.  Yay!

I’ll happily update this blog with pictures when they come, but in the meantime, I ended the day feeling a little smug.

This morning while I was weeding it occurred to me that my prayer life resembles my physical life.  I’m often a squeaky wheel to God.  I ponder this, and wonder if I’m praying right or if God doesn’t get annoyed with me asking over and over for forgiveness for the same stupid things I do or for help. Honestly, I don’t think so.  I am intentional with my prayer – more so than I have ever been – striving to align my desires more and more with God’s plan for me.  There are enough places in the Bible telling us to pray fervently and without ceasing to encourage me in thinking that God is patient with me even when I’m nagging Him.  No doubt, there are times he shakes His head at my pettiness or shortsighted requests, and perhaps He even gets annoyed when He’s answered me and I still persist, but I have no doubt that He continues to listen and love me even when I’m shrill and obnoxious. I’m convinced that even if He doesn’t love the noise I make, He loves this squeaky wheel. That’s just one more beautiful thing about the God we serve!   

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Beauty

Posted on January 21, 2019 by Donna Coulson

My bonus daughter, Amanda and her husband Jarrett are visiting us here on the island this week to celebrate her thirtieth birthday, so I hope you’ll excuse me if instead of my regular blog this week, I simply share this:  in hard times and great times, deep winter or sunshine, God loves you and wants you to feel His presence.  The proof of this is all around us, in every eclipse, every sunset, every breath of breeze and every snowflake.  Just look around!

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Rejoice!

Posted on January 14, 2019 by Donna Coulson

As you may know, Philippians 4: 4-9 is one of my favorite places in the universe.  There are so many reasons I love hanging out among those words.  When I’m floundering it supplies me with a path to follow (let your gentleness be evident to all), when I’m scared I can go sit with God, (the Lord is near), if I’m worrying it takes me to a garden for prayer (present your requests to God).  Today, I’m relaxing beneath the shade of the first nine words.  “Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again I say, rejoice!”  If I follow these directions, I am gifted with a breathtaking, sweeping view. 

Sometimes, though, that’s a big if.   I read the news and I see what my friends post on social media and I know first-hand that life is hard.  Lots of negatives, lots of anger, lots of pain. Very little to celebrate. It’s easy to keep my eyes on the ground and forget to look around. Maybe that’s why Philippians 4:4 tells us twice to rejoice.  Count our blessings, be grateful, see the positives.  Those are active verbs that demand energy and resolve.  Actions that aren’t always easy to accomplish. How can I do it?  Hmmm.

I was stumped for a few minutes about how to go on with this blog.  I do not have the answer to this question. I really don’t.  I went back to Philippians 4, though.  The answer is, in fact, right there.  Verse 8.   Another action verb.  Think.  Consider, ponder, ruminate, concentrate – on a list of eight higher ideas and ideals: truth, nobleness, rightness, purity, loveliness, admirability, excellence, praiseworthiness.  Okay, then.  I can try that.  When I encounter ugly or mean or difficult. When life is overwhelming and it seems like everything is lousy, I do have the ability to change my thinking. That action alone will help me lift my head and once again take in the panorama so that I can do what I started out wanting to do – Rejoice!

Categories: Living on St Croix, Random thoughts on being me | 2 Comments

Hard questions to begin the new year.

Posted on January 7, 2019 by Donna Coulson

I’m pondering a question this morning.  Here’s it is:  Are we human bodies who were imbued with a soul, or are we souls who were imbued with a body?

One side of this coin would contend that I am human first – that is, I was conceived and then at some point a soul either began growing within me or I was infused with one (or even that there isn’t an immortal soul at all). This point of view encourages me to embrace my humanity, and celebrate my fingers and toes, and the thoughts in my head. It helps me revel at human accomplishments.  (Wealth, status, inventions, progress are some of the measures.) It cooperates with our society’s ability to sanction abortion and encourages us to do research for prolonging our lives as long as possible. This perspective embraces human worth, which can encourage the celebration of beauty to the point that it contributes to the human tendency of judging the merits or detriments of others based on factors such as skin color, social status, age, stature and body weight. Thinking we are human first can elevate the wonder and importance of being human, and can encourage us to take pride in how far individuals and our species has come.

The second side of this question insists that somehow our souls existed before the moment of conception and that humanity came second.  This ideation makes some sort of higher Being a given.  This viewpoint encourages the consideration of the mystery and meaning of life in the context of the human experience – embracing the immortal aspects of existence and seeking worth as an eternal being as well as a human one.  Accomplishments in this life are defined differently with this view, and material wealth often becomes a means to an end instead of the end in itself.  Human accomplishments are considered subordinate to what God has done. Since life is eternal and the soul came first, the beginning and end of human life becomes much more sacred. This point of view also embraces human worth, defining that worth more in terms of character. The slippery slope here is that it has the tendency to judge the merits and validity of a person based on their actions in the name of Truth as well as the desire to share Truth, but defining that Truth isn’t easy. This perspective puts forth the idea that humans are children of God and proposes that the earth is not our home.

I don’t want to open up a philosophical can of worms with this, I’m not schooled enough to conclude which is the definitive answer, and anyway, I’d guess that such an argument would be never-ending as we can’t definitively prove it one way or another. But, since I’ve been considering this, I’ve realized that my point of view really can drive my whole approach to living my life.  What I am considering is the practical application of each side and which point of view makes me a better human with a kinder soul.  So, what do you think?  Which came first, your body or your soul?  How does it matter?  How does thinking about this change you? 

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Sticks and stones

Posted on December 31, 2018 by Donna Coulson

I took down our Christmas decorations on Saturday.  The act of packing away the baubles: the jing tinglers and flu floopers (thanks Dr. Seuss for the proper and official names of all the stuff I hang about the house!) always makes me thoughtful. Lost in reverie as I was un-decorating a metal tree on the front patio, I met a marvelous creature – one that Dr. Seuss himself would probably have enjoyed.  I nearly missed him, and if the tree had been a realistic-looking item instead of a stylized metal structure, I would have.   It was a walking stick bug, about five inches long. He was calmly exploring the branches and the bright red and blue and clear ornaments hanging from the gold filigree branches. No doubt, though, he was a bit confused at why there was nothing to eat on this crazy tree. After I ran for my camera and snapped a couple of shots, I helped him down with the help of a magazine (He was actually quite easy to get along with, fragile, long legs moving gracefully across a copy of Coastal Living). I took a few more pictures before I moved him to my garden.  The last time I saw him, he was dancing happily across my wandering Jews.  

I went back to my job, but my mind stayed on that little creature.  I did a little research (life cycle, eating habits, defenses).  Marvelous.  It’s unfathomable to me how much care and thought and precision went into the creation of such a marvelous bug. A bug. Just one of thousands of bugs and creatures created for this world, not to mention all the plants and flowers, rocks and sand and volcanoes. Add that to how they all blend together to live and sustain each other in harmony. Fabulous.

Let yourself ponder the depth of God’s capability.  His creativity, His exactness, the extent of His care in creating this world.  My New Year’s hope for you is that you feel God’s infinite and complete love surrounding you and that you can start 2019 safe in the assurance that a God who applies so much effort, time, and meticulous detail to fashioning a bug that looks like a stick offers us so much more. 

 Happy New Year!

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Except. The Child.

Posted on December 24, 2018 by Donna Coulson

We like things perfect. Christmas brings out the perfectionism in most us, I think.  The perfect tree and decorations, just the right gifts with beautiful wrapping, the menu for Christmas dinner.  Everything for Christmas should be, well, perfect.  Except it isn’t.  The government is partially shut down, fighting and ugliness increase exponentially nearly daily, some of the presents Karl ordered for me inexplicably took a wrong turn and probably won’t be on time.  Sigh. 

Last night we went to a Christmas program put on by the youth of our church (with the help of several others).  Christmas programs, especially those involving kids, are one of those rare Christmas traditions for which perfection is not expected and the imperfections are celebrated and endearing.  Last night’s program was perfect in its imperfection. A few wrong notes and a few forgotten lines all added to the terrific-ness of the evening.  But the message, the true and eternal message, was as perfect as it gets. 

As I watched that program, enjoying plays, skits, music, and poetry, it dawned on me that there is absolutely nothing about the birth of Jesus, except Jesus Himself, that is anywhere close to perfect.  Joseph and Mary must have been miserable – away from home, no room for them in an actual room, labor pains amidst cow poop and chickens scratching. Tired and hurting, Mary has no other choice than to lay her precious newborn in a feed box so she can rest. All she probably wants is a warm shower and a good night’s sleep.  Then, in walks a group of smelly strangers, shepherds.  Remember, I spent time around sheep this summer, I know how bad sheep smell…yuck. Add that to the political weather – Israel is under Roman rule. The leaders are corrupt and dangerous. Their world pretty much sucks and there seems little respite coming their way.

Except.  The child.  Mary looks at His tiny hands and remembers the assurance of the angel’s voice, she listens to the shepherds describe the scene they’ve just witnessed: legions of strong, shiny, heavenly warriors singing praises to God on the prairie as they proclaim the Savior’s birth.  I’m thinking they all were able to forget the deficiencies and trials and complications in the face of such wonder and grandeur and yes – perfection.

Merry Christmas to all.  May we all see past the struggles, worries, the flopped recipes and crooked bows, the wrong-sized gifts and the idiocy of our politics and focus on the perfection we’ve been given.  

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Die Hard Christmas

Posted on December 17, 2018 by Donna Coulson

If you saw my blog right after Thanksgiving, you will remember that I shared my love of cheesy Christmas movies.  I’m happy to report that we have been taking full advantage of the season, and have watched at least a dozen uplifting and enjoyable holiday films. That doesn’t count the six or seven that we started watching, but they were awful and we turned them off.  And, joy!  Since we are still a week and a day from Christmas, there’s more to come. 

Indulging in this guilty pleasure, does bring me guilt, though. Karl and I watch TV together, so he has been a real trooper, hanging in there to watch with me. So, yesterday I got to wondering if there are any ‘manly’Christmas movies.  The first to come to mind was “The Santa Clause” with Tim Allen – he’s a manly man, so it follows that his movies aren’t pegging the Chick Flick Chick Meter.  But then, I remembered a movie we haven’t watched in a very long time and I began to wonder… could it be? Is it really a Christmas movie?  Hmmm. It is set on Christmas Eve.  There’s a Christmas party, a tree, music. (Also machine guns, rocket launchers, blood…)  In my earlier blog I described Christmas movies as: “The plots are simple. Someone is unhappy.  Usually he or she comes home or is called home but it’s not where she (or he) really wants to be. Then, because of the magic of Christmas and some hot guy or girl (often an old flame but not always), minds are changed, the ending is happy, love is in the air, and Christmas comes peacefully and with a beautiful snow shower at the perfect moment.”    So, last evening, we set out to explore the true nature of this classic movie.

Yes!!  This movie fits!  The Bruce Willis character lives in New York.  He goes to LA to see his kids and estranged wife.  He doesn’t want to be barefooted and on the run in a broken glass filled high-rise office building chased by terrorists (added proof this is a Christmas movie – the bad guy’s name is Hans Gruber – the guy who wrote Silent Night is Franz Gruber…crazy huh?) But the main character loves his wife and wants her back.  And,the ending is happy: all the bad guys, including two really arrogant and creepy FBI agents, are dead, the main character is welcomed into the arms of his wife and love is rekindled, and it is snowing (well, they are bearer bonds that have been sucked out of the building, but they look like snow).  Die Hard ends with a kiss.  Perfect! Add that to the smile on Karl’s face when he didn’t have to watch “Crazy for Christmas” instead…Priceless!

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List Making

Posted on December 10, 2018 by Donna Coulson

 

I’ve mentioned before that I am a list maker.  I love lists.  Lists are the epitome of organization and good intentions, they celebrate progress, they are kind taskmasters. I like checking things off lists, it makes me feel powerful and helps me know that I’ve accomplished something.  Normally I have at least five lists going at any one time:

  • prayer list (which includes things I’m especially thankful for and things I’m worried about)
  • grocery list (which includes sub-lists for other stores I usually stop at on grocery day)
  • to do list for the week
  • possible blog ideas
  • books I want to read

If I get serious about making a list of my lists, then I need to add my books I want to write list, my ‘bills to pay each month list’, the yearly goals Karl and I write at the beginning of each year, the list I keep of books of the Bible I’ve studied recently, the birthdays list, Christmas list, a bucket list, exercises I intend to do daily (but rarely actually do!), and probably a dozen more.

A few weeks ago, in the middle of a sermon, Pastor Marthious gave me a challenge for a new list.  His suggestion wasn’t a main point of his sermon, just a passing comment, but it stuck.  He recommended we should have “To Be” lists.  I’ve been pondering this since he said it.  Hmmm.  I know the changes I want to see in myself, the thoughts and actions I have and do but that I don’t like.  With that in mind, my very first “To Be” list includes: be confident in God (and leave worrying behind), be thankful and content, be loving. I haven’t checked them off yet, and the sad thing is, I might not ever achieve them to the point of feeling like I can honestly cross them off with a definitive Done! Yet, since I wrote that list, I feel a difference.  My love and commitment to lists and checking things off spurs me into trying harder to address the items on my To Be list, and it reminds me of who I want to become.  It has also made me start thinking about what God says should appear on my list.  Maybe the top item on my New Year’s Resolution list will be a Bible study to find the answer to that!

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